


A Matter of Choice

by Olivier_Mira



Category: Noblesse (Manhwa)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Childhood Trauma, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-08
Updated: 2018-01-08
Packaged: 2019-03-01 22:50:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13305009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Olivier_Mira/pseuds/Olivier_Mira
Summary: Frankenstein isn't too fond of birthdays. Too many sad childhood memories.





	A Matter of Choice

**Author's Note:**

  * For [BFHwantsblood](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BFHwantsblood/gifts).



> This takes place in the “My Name is Frankenstein” verse and it will make more sense if you read that fic first. Sciency stuff: “Vantablack is a chemical substance made of vertically aligned carbon nanotube arrays and is one of the darkest artificial substances known, absorbing up to 99.9% of radiation in the visible spectrum” (wiki). VANTA stands for “Vertically Aligned NanoTube Arrays.” All you need to know for the purposes of this fic is it is something geeky, awesome and unattainable and therefore irresistible to Tao. ;) Dates: Noblesse continuity, as you probably know, is sketchy at best? So just know that I was not attempting to be canon accurate with dates and years. Music: Coldplay - “Sky Full of Stars,” “Hypnotized,” “Fly On.”

“Tao, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me with this list.” Takeo adjusted his violet sunglasses to better read Tao’s text. “Vantablack?? The darkest substance known to man? Whose locked vault am I supposed to steal that out of?”

“You’re a sniper. I trust you’ll figure it out,” Tao answered, sipping his sugary drink and kicking his left foot in the general direction of Takeo’s head.

Takeo blocked him easily without turning around. “So you want murder for your birthday? That’s rich.”

“Nah, if I wanted that, I’d have given you a different list.”

“What the hell is a CyberPower BattleBox? And why is it $4000?”

“I mostly just want it for parts. I obviously build my own computers. But doesn’t it look cool?”

“Tao, seriously, what the f-”

“You two do realize that if the Boss catches you up here like this, you’re dead shit, right?” M-21 alighted next to RK 1 and 2, who were sunbathing on Frankenstein’s roof, surrounded by snacks and fancy drinks with little umbrellas sticking out of them.

“Thank you, Mr. Killjoy Werewolf.” Tao stood up and took an elaborate bow in M-21’s direction. “But I happen to know that the Boss is currently buried under a mountain of paperwork back at the school.”

“Oh yeah? Well I _happen to know_ that the Boss of our Boss is currently standing on the balcony _right below us._ ”

“Wait, what?” Tao immediately pulled out a tablet and flipped through multiple screens until he was looking at a view of the balcony. Sure enough, there was Cadis Etrama di Raizel, standing looking out onto the horizon, unmoving. “ _Shit._ You think he’ll tell on us?”

“I’m not standing around here to find out.” M-21 leaped off the roof, followed by a scrambling Tao and Takeo, who hurried after him after making sure not a single crumb was left to betray them.

That evening, they were all sitting in companionable silence after dinner as Seira and Regis cleared the dishes. Tao breathed a sigh of relief, thinking the coast was clear. Then Raizel suddenly spoke up.

“Frankenstein.”

“Yes, Master?”

“What is a birthday?”

Tao nearly choked into his teacup.

“A birthday?” Frankenstein put down his newspaper, eyeing Tao suspiciously. “Let me guess. Someone has a birthday coming up?”

Tao giggled nervously.

“Someone has _decided_ that they have a birthday coming up,” Takeo quipped. “And therefore, he expects all of his companions to somehow miraculously produce ridiculously expensive gifts.”

“Hey!” Tao whined, glaring at Takeo. “I deserve to have –”

“Ahem.” Frankenstein cleared his throat, commanding silence. “Master has asked me a question.” He turned to Raizel. “Humans celebrate the day that they were born each year. Often by receiving gifts.”

 _“See?”_ whispered Tao. _“I told you!”_

Takeo was about to respond, but M-21 growled and the two of them fell silent.

Raizel set down his teacup. “So every human has one of these. A birthday.”

“Most of them do, yes.”

“When is yours, Frankenstein?”

“I… don’t have one.”

“Why is that?”

“I…” Frankenstein paused. It was like an internal switch had been flipped: there was suddenly a sad, faraway look in his eyes. He immediately shifted gears and assumed a neutral expression, but not before Raizel gave him one of his searching glances. An awkward silence descended over the table.

Tao spoke up then, despite Takeo grabbing his shakily raised hand and M-21 hissing in his ear. “I… I think I can answer that. Some of us just don’t know. For those of us from the Union anyway… We were taken away as children, so we never knew the day we were born. But! That’s the whole reason why I’m declaring my birthday to be next Wednesday! Because I’ve never had one. So I think I deserve one!”

“So he’s made a giant list, including a $4000 computer…” Takeo poked at Tao.

“And several items that are illegal to own…” M-21 added, raising his grey eyebrows.

“Aww, come on you guys…!”

But Frankenstein and Raizel were clearly no longer listening. They had descended into _that_ sort of silence, which Tao had long suspected was their own secret way of communicating. He seized the opportunity for a quick escape.

“Right, don’t the dishes need doing? I’ll help you guys tonight!”

The three of them immediately jumped to their feet and started heading towards the kitchen. But Frankenstein broke out of his reverie long enough to say one more thing before they could make their getaway.

_“Halt.”_

The three of them froze. They couldn’t see him, but they knew for certain that Frankenstein was smiling his evil smile.

“I _know_ I don’t have to remind you of something like this, but of course you _are_ all aware that defiling our home by lounging on the roof with all of your messy snacks and garbage is not allowed? I can’t imagine that you wouldn’t already know this.”

“Y-yes, Boss,” they answered in unison.

“Good. Carry on.”

***

A wave of nausea passed over Frankenstein after the kids made their way into the kitchen. He _really_ hated feeling like this. The last thing he wanted was to be a burden to his Master, and that’s exactly what was happening right now. Raizel deserved to be able to ask a simple question and get a simple answer without having to caretake him all the time.

But revisiting all of those childhood memories recently had just opened the floodgates and it seemed that anything these days could send him spinning into an abyss of depressing images and feelings from the past. He tried to shield his Master from this as best as he could, but their bond was too strong. Raizel always knew.

**_This topic is a painful one for you._ **

_Yes. I’m… I’m sorry, Master._

Raizel rose from the table in a manner that called for Frankenstein to follow, as if he were extending his hand to him through their bond. Frankenstein trailed his Master wordlessly up the stairs, feeling more and more shame at each step. _He doesn’t need this. He’s had enough of grief. I don’t need to add mine._

They arrived in Raizel’s room, the door swiftly closing behind them. Raizel then took Frankenstein’s physical hand and led him over to the four-poster bed. The Noblesse climbed in, but Frankenstein stopped at the edge of the bed, as if paralyzed.

**_Frankenstein. Come._ **

But he couldn’t do it. Which meant defying his Master, which made him feel even more gut-wrenchingly horrible. He collapsed, shaking, his head in his hands, forehead pressed against the mattress. _I’m sorry, Master. Please don’t bother with me. I’m a mess. I’m not worth your time. I’m not…_

But Raizel was suddenly right beside him. He gathered Frankenstein into his arms and held him, giving him a single command:

**_Stop._ **

Frankenstein shuddered.

Crimson eyes flashed once and they were both on the bed, leaning against the brocade pillows, red velvet curtains closed around them. Frankenstein couldn’t help it; he squirmed in his Master’s embrace, twisting and turning.

_Master. I didn’t… I didn’t mean to…! I didn’t want to… burden you…_

**_Shhhhh. Frankenstein. You’re never a burden. Not to me._ **

Raizel’s arms were as strong as steel. As much as Frankenstein hated himself when he became like this – such _weakness,_ he _abhorred_ it! – still, this feeling, being held so tightly, knowing that no matter how much he struggled, his Master would never let him go… it made him feel so very _safe._

 _Master._ Frankenstein lay breathless, having finally exhausted himself. _I’m sorry, Master._

**_Shhhhh. Frankenstein. It’s okay, love. Just breathe._ **

For several minutes they just lay there, together, breathing. Raizel kept his arms wrapped tightly around his Bonded, infusing him with love, protection and comfort.

_Master. I’m s-_

**_Shhhh. You don’t need to apologize. Just talk to me. Tell me what’s going on._ **

Frankenstein started to resume his fidgeting, but Raizel grasped his hair and gently pulled, which he knew would calm him.

**_Shhhh. It’s okay. Do you want me to tell you what I saw?_ **

Frankenstein inclined his head ever so slightly, a mental nod.

**_You celebrated birthdays as a boy. I saw the image in your mind. You, your former Master, a cake, a candle._ **

_Yes. Frederic decided that the day he became my guardian was to be my birthday._

**_I see._** Raizel’s hand tensed ever so slightly in Frankenstein’s hair as he pulled his Bonded closer.

**_Then I saw you… alone. There was a cake, a candle… But you didn’t blow out the candle. You didn’t eat the cake._ **

_No._

Frankenstein was gripping Raizel’s shoulders so hard that he feared he would leave bruises. The very thought horrified him.

**_Shhhh. It’s okay. Breathe. You’re not there. You’re here. With me. Safe._ **

Raizel carefully moved Frankenstein’s head so that his ear was pressed right against his heart. Frankenstein tried to focus on the sound of his Master’s steady heartbeat, willing his own jackrabbit heart to slow down. Raizel threaded his fingers through Frankenstein’s hair, ever so gently tugging.

**_Are you okay? Shall I continue?_ **

Frankenstein really, really didn’t want to, but he had always gotten through life by charging ahead, despite his terror. _Yes. Yes, it’s okay._

**_There was a candle…_ **

_Yes._

**_Then there was a fire._ **

_Y-yes._

**_The fire destroyed the house._ **

_Yes._

**_You… set that fire._** Raizel’s eyes widened. **_And you’ve felt terrible about it ever since._**

Frankenstein _broke_ then, just completely fell apart. “I-I didn’t know what else to do! If they had found him, I…” He started hyperventilating, his teeth chattering, shaking all over. “Th-the fire was terrible! It could have spread; it could have k-killed people! I could have… But I couldn’t face it and I… I just… I _ran!”_ Frankenstein choked, overwhelmed, unable to continue. Raizel was right there, strong, steady, running his hands up and down his Bonded’s limbs so that he could feel his physical presence.

“Frankenstein, love. Look at me.” Raizel turned so that they were lying side by side. Frankenstein tried to hide his face, turning away from his Master, ashamed. _I’m a horrible person. I’ve always been horrible. I was horrible then and I’m horrible n-_

He stopped. He stopped because he felt an incredibly sharp pain course through their bond and when he opened his eyes… He saw his Master’s face, and there were tears of red blood in his eyes.

_Master!_

Frankenstein clutched Raizel’s face in alarm. Raizel caught him by the wrists.

“Frankenstein. L-listen to me.” Raizel’s voice caught, and Frankenstein’s heart clenched so painfully that he gasped aloud. “ _It wasn’t your fault._ Do you understand? You were a _child._ ”

Frankenstein’s shaking hands were stained red. “B-but Master… Master, I’m… I’m _broken!”_ He moved to hang his head, but Raizel touched their foreheads together, salty tears mingling with red.

**_Then I will hold your pieces until you are together again._ **

Frankenstein gave up: he clung to his Master and sobbed. Burying his face in Raizel’s shoulder, he cried messy, ugly tears. These were not the elegant tears of the charming Chairman of Ye Ran High School; these were the panicky tears of a terrified little boy who had no one in the world to turn to.

Raizel held Frankenstein tightly, intoning to his Bonded over and over again: **_It’s okay. I’ve got you. You’re going to be okay. I promise._**

_I was so afraid._

**_I know. I know, love. Anyone would have been._ **

_I… should have done better._

**_No. You did the best you could. You were eight years old._ **

_I was weak._

**_You were strong. You have always been strong._ **

Frankenstein unconsciously began rubbing his head against Raizel’s shoulder. Whenever he did this, Raizel knew what he wanted. Closing his eyes and then reopening them, casting a gentle ruby glow into the darkness, he inhaled, then exhaled, unfurling his magnificent crimson wings. Frankenstein immediately curled up next to his Master in fetal position, safely enfolded in both his arms and his wings.

**_Shhhhh. That’s it, my love. You are safe. Just take it in._ **

There was something Raizel did with his wings that he knew Frankenstein loved and it never failed to pacify him. It was almost like a massage, all of his soft scarlet feathers undulating in wave after wave, gently moving around him in a comforting motion. Soon Frankenstein was stretching like a long-limbed feline, exalting in his Master’s touch, as if Raizel’s silken feathers could somehow wash all his pain and grief away.

 _Master._ Frankenstein opened his eyes and his breath caught: Raizel’s cheeks were still stained with blood. Tears springing anew, Frankenstein lifted his quivering lips to his Master’s face to kiss those crimson streaks away.

But as soon as his Master’s blood touched his lips, it was as if Frankenstein were being transported on a ruby red river, gently gliding along, all of his burdens washed away. Love was in front of him; love was beside him; all around him there was nothing but love. This was Raizel’s domain and Frankenstein found it impossible to hold on to his grief, his anxiety, his guilt. He finally let go. **_Yes. Let me love you. Frankenstein. You are my Bonded. You are my Beloved. It is my sacred duty to keep you safe. Please let me do this._**

As Frankenstein drifted into a deep sleep in his arms, a seed of an idea started forming in Raizel’s mind.

***

Tao’s birthday was a great success. For once, Frankenstein allowed for them to have as many sodas and snacks as they wanted – under pain of death that they would be completely cleaned up, of course. Tao was completely stunned when he found out that they had somehow managed to get him actual Vantablack – “I was mostly kidding about that!” Takeo and Frankenstein exchanged furtive grins and Tao was actually, for once, speechless.

A number of months later, Tao and Takeo were lounging on the roof _again_ – pushing it was Tao’s middle name after all – when suddenly he looked to his left and there were the perfectly polished boots of Cadis Etrama di Raizel, having just appeared out of nowhere. Tao nearly jumped 20 feet straight up in the air. “S-sir! I am so sorry! We were only up here momentarily! Please do not take offense…!”

But Raizel’s face was completely neutral. “I require your assistance with something.”

***

Frankenstein was a bit suspicious as to why Tao insisted that he clear his schedule for the evening, but he had learned to just roll with it when it came to Tao. He only hoped they hadn’t blown anything up again. It was uncanny how danger-prone the three of them seemed to be…

“SURPRISE!”

Frankenstein blinked. His kitchen was covered in purple balloons and streamers and everyone – Tao, Takeo, M-21, Regis, Seira and _even his beloved Master_ – wore shiny purple party hats. Frankenstein turned pale and was about to object strenuously to this, when Raizel _smiled_ at him.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY FRANKENSTEIN!”

**_Happy birthday, my Bonded._ **

Frankenstein was so shocked that he actually allowed Tao to crown him with a purple tiara that read, “Birthday Princess.” Everything from then on happened in a blur.

Still absurdly grateful for having been gifted with the darkest substance known to man, Tao had gone all out. He built Frankenstein a robotic steam cleaner using state of the art nanotech that not only deep cleaned, but also utilized cutting-edge polymers to prevent scuffing. Takeo had helped him with the mechanical parts, hence it was entirely trigger-operated (“It’s like the Dark Spear for dirt!” Tao had exclaimed to an elated Frankenstein). They also promised to use it immediately after the party, since they knew he was already worried that this celebration was going to result in him scrubbing the kitchen for a week. (They were not wrong).

M-21 surprised everyone by producing a framed charcoal drawing of all of them seated at the dinner table entitled, “Home.” Their likenesses were uncanny. Frankenstein was amazed, having previously had no idea that M-21 could draw. He couldn’t help but exclaim, “M-21, you _made_ this??” The shy werewolf nodded once, then averted his eyes, but Frankenstein could still see the pink in his cheeks.

Regis and Seira formally presented him with a gift of matching cufflinks in the shape of their respective family crests. Hanging from each one was a miniature charm featuring their soul weapons: a tiny scythe and a tiny lance. “The charms will call the House Landegre and the House Loyard to your aid,” Regis proclaimed. Then, in a more deferential tone, bowing his head in the direction of the Noblesse, “Ahem. Not to imply that you would ever require our meagre assistance. Nevertheless.”

Meanwhile, Frankenstein had been trying to discern this entire time whether Raizel had been in on the preparations for this event or not. He found out when the Noblesse quietly produced a small black box. Frankenstein looked up at him in surprise.

_Master!_

**_Open it._ **

_Yes, Master._

Frankenstein willed his hands not to shake as he pried open the velvet box. When he finally managed to get it open, he gasped aloud. Inside was an exquisitely beautiful ring. It was shaped like a jeweled phoenix, its tiny feathers inlaid with rubies.

“Master! I-I cannot…!”

**_Yes, you can._ **

Raizel reached out, took hold of Frankenstein’s left hand and deftly slid the ring onto his third finger. Frankenstein immediately noticed two things. One, his Master must have used his blood to create this ring, as he could feel it humming with his energy. And two, as he raised his hand and examined the ring closely, he noticed a tiny detail: right in the center of the breast of the phoenix, nestled close to its heart, was a single amethyst stone. Frankenstein had to bite the tip of his tongue in order not to cry in front of the kids.

“Master…”  Their eyes locked. _I love you._ “Thank you.”

 ** _And I you._** “Happy birthday, Frankenstein.”

Tao, _bless him,_ chose that moment to burst out with, “Hooray! Let’s bring out the cake!” Everyone clapped and started singing (except Regis, who refused to be seen doing something so undignified).

_Master, I… don’t know what to say._

**_Frankenstein. You are mine to cherish. Please allow me this._ **

_Master._

Frankenstein hoped anyone who noticed him briefly wiping his eyes would assume it was because of the smoke from the birthday candles.

***

Later that evening, they were curled up next to each other in bed and Frankenstein was admiring his new ring. “Master, it is absolutely enchanting. However did you make it?”

**_You never reveal to me your creation secrets. I shall keep mine as well._ **

“That is true!” Frankenstein laughed. It felt like forever since he had done so. He snuggled up closer to his Master.

**_Frankenstein._ **

_Yes, Master?_

**_Do you know why I chose this day?_ **

“Hmmm?” Frankenstein sat up. He actually hadn’t thought about it. “January 1st? Does it have any special-” He thought about it for a second. “Wait. Master… did _you_ plan all of this??”

**_You assumed it was Tao._ **

“Yes, I assumed it was Tao! Master! I… really?”

 ** _Yes, really._** Raziel’s eyes were smiling. “Frankenstein. It has been 932 years since we met. To this day.”

“What? Master… you kept track??” Frankenstein couldn’t believe it.

Raizel did something completely unexpected then: he blushed. Frankenstein couldn’t help but reach out and touch his Master’s warm cheek. _Master?_

**_No, I did not keep track. I asked Gejutel._ **

“You asked _Gejutel??_ How the hell did he know?” Frankenstein puffed up like… well, like a peacock.

Raizel’s smile spread to his lips. **_Don’t you recall? He was there on the day we first met. Gejutel has always kept excellent records._**

“But… why would he record… something like that?”

“I believe the exact words he wrote down in his book were, ‘Frankenstein: clearly suspicious. Must keep an eye on him.’”

“Ach, of course he did!” Frankenstein rolled his eyes. “But, Master… you went and asked Gejutel about this just so you could…?”

“Yes. Frankenstein.” Raizel paused, tucking a stray lock of blonde hair behind Frankenstein’s ear. **_I wanted you to have a happy birthday to replace… all the sad ones._**

_Master._

Frankenstein’s heart swelled. He reached to clasp Raizel’s hands, but his Master was already reaching for his. Raizel then surprised him again: he removed the phoenix ring from Frankenstein’s finger.

_Master?_

“Frankenstein. I gave you this ring as a promise. A promise as your Master to cherish you and to never hurt you. I wanted this to be your new birthday.” Raizel held out the ring so it caught the light, sparkling red to match his eyes. He then looked back at Frankenstein. **_And I could think of no better day than the day you were born to me._**

Frankenstein waited. It was unusual for his Master to be so hesitant. He assumed it must be important.

“But…” Raizel began. He took Frankenstein’s left hand in his, setting the ring in his open palm. “I want this to be your choice. You didn’t have a choice before. Your first birthday was taken from you. Your second birthday was assigned to you. I… want this one to be yours to choose.”

Frankenstein closed his fingers around the ring. “Master! I chose to enter into contract with you. I agreed. It was my choice. You were my choice.”

 ** _I know this._** Raizel enclosed Frankenstein’s fist in between his two hands. **_But I want this to be your choice, too._**

Frankenstein responded by sliding off the bed, never letting go of Raizel’s hands. He then got on one knee and placed his left hand in Raizel’s, handing him the phoenix ring with his right. “Master. I would be delighted to accept your gift of this ring, this promise, and my new birthday. And please let me take this opportunity to pledge myself to you anew.” He bowed his head.

Raizel replaced the ruby ring on Frankenstein’s finger. Then suddenly, Frankenstein found himself with his arms full of his Master. Their lips met and Frankenstein thought his heart might burst with sheer pleasure and joy.

January 1st was now his favorite day of the year.

 


End file.
